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Monday, December 11, 2023

Rashami Desai: “The Way You Treat Me, I Will Treat You The Same Way”

Rashami Desai is a diva who has sparkled on the small screen with her stunning looks, strong presence and prowess.

After years of endeavours, we finally saw the actor enter the Bigg Boss 13 house and the experience was no less than turbulence for her.

Whether it’s personal and professional grudges or newly discovered friendships, the popular face has witnessed a plethora of emotions. 

But all said and done, she has definitely grown stronger. If anything, the experience has acted as a mirror, revealing the truth – despite how unsavoury it may have been.

Filme Shilmy managed to catch up with Rashami and have a candid chat (in Gujarati, Hindi and English) about her journey in BB13.

Every year there was always speculations of you participating on Bigg Boss, but you wouldn’t be in it. What sealed the deal for you this time?

This time it was very interesting for me and I wasn’t sure until the last moment when I spoke to the makers and creative team of Bigg Boss.

They said that the theme was very different and a lot of actors are only going to be a part of it… I was very hesitant with the commoners vs celebrity concept because our lives are different in comparison to the lifestyle of an ordinary person.

I was a little afraid as to whether I’d be able to do it or not, but this time I just did it.

Yes, the journey was very difficult inside because I was going through so much during the show. It was harder than I imagined.

The series was quite a roller coaster journey for you. How prepared were you for the number of personal revelations that occurred on the show?

Whatever personal topics that came out on the show and the problems I’ve faced throughout the series, honestly, I wasn’t prepared at all for it.

It came as a shock to me because it’s okay to feel fluttered for a moment while walking.

But it hurts more when someone kicks you while you are walking because you are not ready or prepared for it at that moment.

I wasn’t ready to accept the reality and it took a while. But during the interviews and talks which were happening during my journey inside, I got the message loud and clear that it’s not going to work.

So I took the wise decision albeit at an unhurried pace. I didn’t take any impulsive decisions.

I realised that this man (Arhaan Khan) is not for me and can’t be together in the future.

Had Arhaan not been on the show, in what way (if at all) do you think your experience would’ve been more different or positive?

Even I reflect back now and think that if I knew the reality, this would’ve never happened. I made it official.

But then I got to know from my mentor and well-wisher Salman Khan. When he told me, it was shocking and I was broken for a while.

I didn’t know how to behave, act or talk. I was trapped in such a place with people who don’t even like me or understand the pain/difficulty I was facing.

It was very difficult for me during that time. That person was in front of my eyes 24×7. I couldn’t even detach myself.

Never in my wild thoughts did I think that he would do this. I had a lot of questions and he wasn’t able to answer and said: “once you’re out, I’ll give you the answers.”

But I received all my responses during the show so I made it official that we’re not together anymore.

Having said that though… You kind of expressed love to him the day after he was exposed?

I completely understand but it’s a human tendency. When you have loved someone and spent time with that person, emotionally attached, it takes time for one to detach themselves.

They cannot do the same thing overnight. Let’s be frank. I was in shock and not ready to accept the reality.

I had a lot of questions and kept saying “outside I’ll show you” but I was a little traumatised… “Has this actually happened? Is it really true?”

Salman sir has always been a well-wisher and told me about it… Officially, I got to know about it.

After 2 days, Asim asked me how I felt for him. I said that what I felt is very less but when I met him, I was a different person.

I used to be very ruthless and blunt. Very rude and never had that ‘love’ feeling – but that person made me realise those sentiments.

I was also going through a lot of health issues but he helped me at the time. I helped him overall. Everywhere, I supported him.

I was feeling cheated and wasn’t ready to accept it. It’s only natural to be unable to detach yourself from that person.

It was lovely to see you and Devoleena share friendship together but after her departure, many claimed that you got lost. Would you agree with this?

I was and the kind of journey I had as a contestant was not easy. If it was another girl other than myself, maybe she would’ve left the house – I’m sure.

But the way I have handled it, it was very powerful. Yes, I made a mistake, but I have moved on.

He should’ve told me beforehand and I would’ve told him whether I was comfortable there and then.

After announcing it on national television and me finding out from someone else is WRONG.

Even after eviction, you’re meeting the contestants to justify yourself? Dude, you’re only creating a mess for yourself.

Now that you and Sidharth are cordially co-existing, would you consider giving a friendship another try, or working together again soon?

Even I’ve realised that we can be friends a lot of people are asking for it, but let’s see.

I have always told one thing to Sidharth and all my friends who knew me as a person. I was very soft-hearted.

But the way you treat me, I will treat you the same way. It has to be very mutual.

If we become friends, he would be very happy to have me as I’m a wonderful friend to have in someone’s life.

You also found a friend in Asim. How much moral support was he during the process?

Asim he protected me at times when I was physically attacked. But when it comes to fighting, I always used to fight for him and he did for me also.

I think that’s a true friend and he is like family to me now. So, I’m very comfortable with him.

Reflecting back over this experience, what has been the greatest learning for you and how do you hope to implement this in life?

I think you need to be very content and more clear to yourself so that you don’t create anymore mess around you.

Honestly speaking, it’s important for one to respect themselves. It’s not only me – just generally. Sometimes we put others’ first and keep us as last of priority.

That’s a wrong thing. So when one puts themselves as first priority automatically, things will start falling into place and people will love that.

How has life been for you on the outside since the show? Any interesting areas which you’d like to explore as an actor and why?

I would like to explore everything as an actor because our profession doesn’t have any limits.

I choose to be limitless and play different roles. The beauty of being an actor is that you can live the life of anyone.

Yes, I really have my eyes set on Bollywood so I am working towards it and doing a project. So pray for me!

Listen to our interview podcast with Rashami Desai here:


Beside professional ambitions, what are your personal hopes and expectations from life now?

I want to create history. Even if I’ve physically gone from the world, I really want people to remember me.

Well, Rashami has definitely created history already by being amongst the highest-paid television actresses of India.

Her contribution to the Indian television industry has been immense and after her stint in Bigg Boss, she has only grown stronger.

Filme Shilmy wishes her all the best for future projects!

Anuj Radia
Journalist and film enthusiast.

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